“To be conscious that we are perceiving or thinking is to be conscious of our own existence. Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.”
Centuries before our existence Aristotle coined this phrase; and yet, as we navigate today’s world this thought remains as prevalent as what it was back then.
These days, we’ve become so caught up in evaluating everything and everybody else. 9 times out of 10, it is easier to do that than having to peep into the mirror of our own self.
Alongside literacy and math, we should be teaching our kids, the “happiest people are those who are evaluating and improving oneself.”
It’s also important that we model this approach.
Truthfully, there is nothing more satisfying than evaluating and judging others in reverse. This may seem wishy-washy, however, knowing yourself is key to all successes.
If we can acknowledge our own loopholes then and only then, can one address the issues that become ‘blockers’ and move towards accomplishment. Nobody can be the better assessor of you, than you.
That said – in self-assessment, we don’t want to become too arrogant and liberal with evaluation (that makes it an easy out); or on the contrary, an extra under-estimator. As always, there needs to be balance!
At Tutor Partners, we teach our students that if you know and believe the ability you have within is capable – you’re the one who writes your own success story.
True self-evaluation is not that easy. To make this job less daunting, listed below are some ways, we all can learn to reflect (without any bias):
1. Overcoming Fear
The major first step is facing your fears. Acknowledge weaknesses and excuses of avoidance. Simply put, have guts to assess personal difficulties. Own them, take them and view constructive criticism in a positive light as a way forward.
Overcoming hurdles, means pushing through comfort zones when situations are tough. It’s essential to maintain commitment, regardless. Let the worst out. The fear of mistakes for example, can be turned around. We should, in fact, use errors to our advantage for improvement.
As mentioned above, we humans are liberal when it comes to evaluating ourselves. However, digging out the most genuine feedback is best for the long term.
This doesn’t mean creating an entire list of negatives. The motive behind honesty is to include both parts. It’s obvious that highlighting positives is motivating and pinpointing negatives won’t automatically incite action. Fundamentally, things become habituated, and it’s not comfortable to break habits. Kids need to know, bravery accompanied by action is what leads to change! Be honest!
3. Avoid Comparisons
As mentioned in our “Who Are The Joneses?” article, comparisons significantly hinder progress.
Our biggest enemy is jealousy and comparison to others. It’s that trap, whereby we focus on what others have, or what’s expected of us, that we forget about the importance of kids (and ourselves) having self-awareness. We will never understand our own capabilities if we don’t first, believe in them. This goes for adults, children and teens alike.
By comparisons, we lose the power to fight within us. It’s vital that kids are reminded of this too.
4. Constructive Feedback Helps
There are times when someone else may know us better than we know ourselves.
Feedback should be taken from different individuals of varied connections. Less defensiveness and more active listening to feedback with a positive attitude can help, as a guide. However, it’s best not to absorb too much perception, as this isn’t healthy. Moderation is key.
There will forever be conflicting views:
“Aristotle was famous for knowing everything. He taught that the brain exists merely to cool the blood and is not involved in the process of thinking. This is true only of certain persons.”
We can only become better at something in a way that fits – it is not going to happen with singular solutions. Encourage awareness with the motto of: “ Keep working on it”.
Life takes commitment and persistence.
5. Taking A Different Light
Alongside the above, seeing yourself as others do is the most candid way to address actions and reactions.
This isn’t about emulating anybody (Avoid comparisons, remember). Moreover, wearing another ‘pair of shoes’ helps us to examine circumstances in a different light. We want to teach young people, observation is key. When we attempt to see what he/she is seeing, we often come to realize that affirmative action begins with ourselves.
Don’t miss out on the message. Get involved with our Powerful Parents Mastermind today. Kids follow our lead, so paying attention to our own values, strengths and weakness, results in a pathway towards success.
Just be, live freely.